is this the sara with the beer cane?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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