when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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