i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
