He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize