I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I just found a bag of teeth...
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Randomize
