When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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