i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
