11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
