they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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