I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
What a dumb baby whore.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
we should paint friendship bongs
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
