Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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