sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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