What a fucking waste of an outfit
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize