I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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