Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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