We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
