the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize