So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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