Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
