Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize