Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Randomize
