remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
