its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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