Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
