when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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