He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize