Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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