yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
