He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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