I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
