Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
