Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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