I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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