covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize