2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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