I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
