Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
