The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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