It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
They took my balls.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize