Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
