Texts From Last Night

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  (816): View more from Missouri

  My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.

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  (816): My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won. http://tfl.nu/68w0
  Replies (4) Good night (902) Bad night (1009)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.

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  (610): all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville. http://tfl.nu/k1x4
  Replies (6) Good night (8139) Bad night (1613)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.

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  (506): I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number. http://tfl.nu/oux0
  Replies (11) Good night (6019) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.

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  (314): Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen. http://tfl.nu/614c
  Replies (10) Good night (4033) Bad night (732)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old

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  (410): I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old http://tfl.nu/pmig
  Replies (9) Good night (2186) Bad night (1317)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.

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  (313): Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs. http://tfl.nu/t847
  Replies (8) Good night (2338) Bad night (537)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.

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  (949): Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/wgn7
  Replies (10) Good night (1394) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants

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  (518): I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants http://tfl.nu/tuxk
  Replies (8) Good night (585) Bad night (1231)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?

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  (613): Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you? http://tfl.nu/o3d1
  Replies (4) Good night (1660) Bad night (440)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.

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  (416): It's like shitshowville, population: those girls. http://tfl.nu/vlzn
  Replies (2) Good night (1097) Bad night (469)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".

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  (916): Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles". http://tfl.nu/t7tu
  Replies (4) Good night (1011) Bad night (549)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.

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  (530): All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls. http://tfl.nu/uabx
  Replies (12) Good night (766) Bad night (1079)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack

  (1-315): View more from New York

  This is why I love you...

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  (315): Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack (1-315): This is why I love you... http://tfl.nu/jq03
  Replies (5) Good night (834) Bad night (203)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!

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  (412): i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt! http://tfl.nu/8lpp
  Replies (5) Good night (712) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?

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  (760): Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection? http://tfl.nu/93gn
  Replies (5) Good night (314) Bad night (447)

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