Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You took a bar mat shot.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.