and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
