I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
not ubering you a puppy
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
