I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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