I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
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I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
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Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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