It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Randomize
