I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
