Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Randomize
