We're like a lot better than the average bears
it's like iHOP with fire
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
