You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
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Is it penis luge time yet?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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