We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
