It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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